Daily/Reports From Last Night


Images of the fine folks on The Daily Show and/or The Colbert Report, captioned with the help of Texts From Last Night.

Features the mod's macros, reblogs of my earlier submissions to the related blog Texts From the Anchor Desk, and reader contributions sent directly here.

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68 notes | January 12 2013

(917): My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard

(917): My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard

Tagged: stephen colbertdaily/reports from last nightsubmission

0 notes | January 11 2013

(406): Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.

(406): Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.

Tagged: jon stewartstephen colbertdaily/reports from last nightreader contributionsubmission

45 notes | January 10 2013

(978): I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
(617): I would be honored to be that friend.

(978): I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people


(617): I would be honored to be that friend.

Tagged: daily/reports from last nightrally to restore sanitysubmission

14 notes | January 9 2013

(604): You texted me ‘I am the leopard prince’, with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not “a little bit” drunk dude..

(604): You texted me ‘I am the leopard prince’, with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not “a little bit” drunk dude..

Tagged: stephen colbertcatsdaily/reports from last nightsubmission

152 notes | January 8 2013

(973): how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?

(973): how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?

Tagged: jon stewartstephen colbertdaily/reports from last nightsubmission

7 notes | January 7 2013

(270): It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night

(270): It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night

Tagged: stephen colbertdaily/reports from last nightsubmission

8 notes | January 6 2013

(434): did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?

(434): did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?

Tagged: stephen colbertdaily/reports from last nightsubmission

10 notes | January 5 2013

(661): Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.

(661): Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.

Tagged: jon stewartdaily/reports from last nightsubmission

4 notes | January 4 2013

(425): My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?

(425): My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?

Tagged: stephen colbertdaily/reports from last nightsubmission

15 notes | January 3 2013

(484): all i remember was you yelling “look at my little feet” at everyone on the way home from the bar.

(484): all i remember was you yelling “look at my little feet” at everyone on the way home from the bar.

Tagged: stephen colbertdaily/reports from last nightsubmission